From Chai-Paani to Scotch: The Evolution of the Bribe

Vice

From Chai-Paani to Scotch: The Evolution of the Bribe

Illustration: Sushant Ahire

T

he act of bribery is in many ways like the act of sex. Being caught at a traffic light is like the dance of love, where two parties approach each other warily. You talk of lights, traffic, and life, but beneath it all, the subtext runs heavy. Then there’s that moment when the Netflix ends and the chill begins, and both parties give each other subtle verbal and non-verbal cues before actually doing the deed.

The physical act of bribery though is like bad sex – you whip it out in desperation, the other person hesitates for a bit, it all ends before it even begins, and the actual deed gets done in under three minutes. After that there’s no question of a cuddle, as both parties rapidly walk away in opposite directions doing their own versions of the walk of shame.

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