Twenty years ago in India, there was one box-like device with numbers on it that bonded families together like a viewing of Hum Saath Saath Hain. The landline had a wire that kept you rooted – but it could also set you free if you chose to be unavailable.

The online sale is an annual event now, just like the Mumbai Marathon, your marriage anniversary, or the Champions League final. We remember the date, we remember the time, and we know which deals we have to act on.

As the US waits patiently for their internet to get ruined, the Indian government has accepted the telecom authority's recommendations in a big win for Indian net neutrality. Learn from us America, you don't need any more inequality.

It might seem shocking, given how some of our ministers think the internet was invented during the Mahabharata, but the Indian internet is actually a marvel – compared to the EU and USA, who are considering draconian copyright laws and doing away with net neutrality respectively.

Facebook is back in the news, this time for giving at least 60 device makers “deep access” to data of users and their friends, without obtaining their explicit consent. At this point it would make more sense for Facebook to release a list of companies they haven’t shared data with.

When I heard of Google Duplex, I went into overdrive thinking of all the things I’d never have to do again if Duplex could stay on the down-low. Customer care executives, annoying relatives, and break ups were all things from which I’d be forever freed.

When the rise of the machines becomes a reality, they will be coming for every Sharmaji ka beta – the doctor, engineer, IT professional. And the perennially stoned creative, who was always told that he would never amount to anything in life, will have the last laugh with his chai and sutta.

For somehow managing to be the guy who gave the world both Farmville and a dose of Donald Trump, Mark Zuckerberg, who appeared today in front of the US Senate, is our Person of the Week.

Social media is only following Rule 34 of the internet – if something exists online, a porn version of it must exist too. Social media’s Rule 34 avatar is sexual media. And LinkedIn’s Red Light District is only a by-product of this.

Will the new virtual ID really change anything for Aadhaar? When compared with the ordered system of getting a fresh passport, with all its regulations in place, the process of acquiring an Aadhaar seems closer to getting a gym membership.