Fixo, Kadha Prasad, and Being Sikh


Fixo, Kadha Prasad, and Being Sikh

Illustration: Akshita Monga/Arré


y grandfather turns 93 this year and is not well. After his attack last year, he lives on in the dark room of his own mind, closed off to the world around him.

Last year, I sat at the hospital with him. He asked for his spectacles. Ainaka’n, he said. I tell him I’m looking for them. My Punjabi is rusty but I enjoy using it. The words come out wrong and the syntax is awkward, but I persist. My grandfather looks at me in the way he has often looked at me in the past – beseeching me not to speak in Punjabi. He has offered me good money for this.