{"id":3875,"date":"2016-04-26T11:59:04","date_gmt":"2016-04-26T06:29:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/13.201.39.237\/?p=3875"},"modified":"2016-04-26T11:59:04","modified_gmt":"2016-04-26T06:29:04","slug":"new-years-eve-mumbai","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.arre.co.in\/?p=3875","title":{"rendered":"\u201cPapa Nahin Aane Denge\u201d: Why I Miss the Excuse that Saved Me from New Year\u2019s Eve Disasters"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

A<\/span><\/p><\/div>

s the year comes to an end, \u00a0I have \u201cThank u, next\u201d playing in my head. I mean, year-ends and breakups are pretty much the same deal for me: The beginning is full of false promises and unbridled excitement, but by the end, I\u2019m forced to pay the price for believing in both the year and the boy. <\/span>\n\nNew Year Eve\u2019s plans<\/span><\/a> are worse. The trauma is quite close to experiencing menstrual cramps for the very first time \u2013 and then having a guy friend mansplain how benign this pain is. Anyway, the pressure to be cool during this time is real. And not having any plans is giving me the jitters. <\/span>\n\nThis pressure can only get magnified if, like me, you find yourself interning at <\/span>Woke Media<\/span><\/a> Inc. You deal with your singledom as your friends trace their happily-ever-afters, and come to terms with the fact that what\u2019s staring you in the face is an isolated New Year\u2019s. The constant urgency to put out a \u201clit\u201d face on Instagram doesn\u2019t help my nerves. I know this is the only next big thing before the <\/span>2019 elections<\/span><\/a>, and my campaign has nowhere near started. <\/span>\n\nOf course, I always have the option of going off social media and saving myself the embarrassment of staying in. Especially now that I have moved out of my dry state, the <\/span>vikasest<\/span><\/a> of them all, Gujarat. Until last month, if someone asked me to define my entire life in one word, I\u2019d say \u201cprotected\u201d. Fiercely. With <\/span>parents who were learning to be liberal<\/span><\/a> in slow installments, I was bestowed with 11 pm curfews, \u201cHum tumko station chhodne aayenge\u201d kind of love, and a generous helping of \u201cLadka aur ladki ek jaise nahi hote\u201d. <\/span>\n\nBut the Z-level security has temporarily come to a halt as I made a move to <\/span>Mumbai<\/span><\/a>, a city with multiple names and shades. I was here without parental guidance and it was time to channel my <\/span>inner party animal<\/span><\/a>. <\/span>\n\n

Year-ends and breakups are pretty much the same deal for me.<\/p><\/blockquote> \n\nI am expected to have a crazy banger NYE scene. Considering that this is my first time in Mumbai, the performance pressure is even more \u2013 this is my one big chance to party, non-Gujju style (yes all our celebrations are a lot like the <\/span>Ambani wedding<\/span><\/a> minus the lavishness). If I\u2019ve to go by millennial motivational partygoer, Sir Wiz Khalifa\u2019s manifesto titled \u201cYoung, Wild, and Free,\u201d I\u2019m supposed to get drunk, smoke weed, just have mad fun. <\/span>\n\nThe only problem is that this Parvati was never <\/span>Poo<\/span><\/a> to start with. In fact, I am that next-level accha baccha who sits at home enthusiastically watching those <\/span>year-end award functions<\/span><\/a>. But this time, I am neither home, nor protected by the classic \u201cYaar mummy, papa nahin aane denge\u201d excuse. \u00a0<\/span>\n\nPlus, I don\u2019t get the hype about ringing in the New Year, all intoxicated, drowning in your miseries, surrounded by people who spend half their time with their heads in the pot. And if I needed to be reminded of everything that went wrong with my life and celebrate my existential crisis that has prolonged for yet another year, I would rather do it with my <\/span>therapist<\/span><\/a>. <\/span>\n\nBut here I am, alone in the big bad city, with my friends back home looking at me with great expectations, to live their dream. But to be honest, the options that I have in front of me aren\u2019t earth-shattering. There\u2019s obviously the <\/span>millennial<\/span><\/a>-favourite \u201cSwiping your New Year away\u201d. It\u2019s probably the easiest and the riskiest because I\u2019m expected to match with a boy who is equally vella and who may or may not like taking a gym selfie and then captioning it #Sapiosexual. Because it is kinda sad, ending my year with a <\/span>random stranger<\/span><\/a> who is \u201cnot here to make friends babez!!!\u201d <\/span>\n\nThe other choice I have, is to hang with my office peeps. But that isn\u2019t really an option\u2026 reality check\u2026 I\u2019m an <\/span>intern<\/span><\/a>, and for now, I\u2019m just glad they remember by name. And I don\u2019t think it\u2019d be wise to let the entire office know that I\u2019m that sad loner who has no one to really hang out with post-work. <\/span>\n\nSo the only real option in front of me right now, is going back home. If someone had proposed this idea in grad school, I\u2019d have pulled my hair apart. But as the year-end approaches, there is nothing I want more than to get back to the familiarity of my city. I crave the company of those handful of friends. Or simply hanging at home with mum and dad. But did I mention, I\u2019m an intern? <\/span>I probably won\u2019t get the day off<\/span><\/a>. <\/span>\n\nNow, I have weighed pros and cons, analysed the social media forecast, the pH levels of peer pressure, and have decided, imma stay indoors. Be it Mumbai or Ahmedabad, the award functions on TV remain the same. \u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am in Mumbai without parental guidance and am expected to have a banger New Year\u2019s scene. The only problem is that I am a Parvati who was never Poo to begin with. 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