The Five Painful Stages of Renting a House in Mumbai

Humour

The Five Painful Stages of Renting a House in Mumbai

Illustration: Ahmed Sikander

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hat’s tougher than looking for a needle in a haystack? Looking for a habitable house in Mumbai. I just completed the process of moving into a rented flat for the third time in three years. Now that I’ve been around the block a few times, even this scarring experience has started to feel routine. You really can get immune to anything, no matter how terrible it might seem at first. Just like Mumbai’s train rides or the monsoon.

But even though I’m now more familiar with my broker than Jai is to Veeru, there’s no denying that moving remains as unpleasant as finding out that Gabbar has abducted Basanti. I find it easier to cope when I know what to expect, so I’ve catalogued the process of renting houses, right from the search for that one musty room which can just about occupy a sofa-cum-bed to saying good riddance to that nosy neighbour who asks you everytime he sees you with your girlfriend, “Beta, shaadi kab kar rahe ho?

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