Twitter to Increase Character Limit So That Shashi Tharoor Can Complete A Sentence

Humour

Twitter to Increase Character Limit So That Shashi Tharoor Can Complete A Sentence

Illustration: Ahmed Sikander

No, this is not an exasperating farrago of distortions. Barely a year after Twitter revised its character count per tweet from 140 to 280, it has been forced to further increase its count after Shashi Tharoor complained he could only tweet up to one word at a time.

Following yesterday’s tweet, in which Tharoor used the word “floccinaucinihilipilification” to talk about his new book, Twitter’s servers crashed. “We restored it after we increased the character limit to match Shashi’s vocabulary, or Avogadro’s number,” said a Twitter spokesperson.

“After reading about five tweets, we understood that he was trying to string together a sentence. But we do not know the meaning of the word because none of the existing dictionaries can provide a definition,” the spokesperson added.

Tharoor claimed he was standing for the rights of people suffering from #Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia (the fear of long words). His statement, translated by the Queen of England into normal English, said 280 characters were barely enough for him to type out a 20-syllable word, let alone a 21-syllable word.

In the meanwhile, Tharoor’s publisher for his new book has asked him to write a dictionary to be sold along with it.

“Our team of proof readers need to first understand what he is writing. We have told him, it is his responsibility to ensure he isn’t saying something that could be termed anti-national. We don’t want income tax guys visiting for a cup of tea and no one can tell what he’s saying anymore,” the head of the publishing house said.

The publishers of the Oxford Dictionary have been alerted of the latest development, and put out a statement in panic.

“If we are asked to include all the words Shashi Tharoor uses in general conversation, the collective weight of our dictionaries will go up a few kilos. Who is going to bear the cost?” a statement from their head office read.

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