Modi Won’t Attend Kite Festival This Year; Says Only Need Mic To Lapet

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Modi Won’t Attend Kite Festival This Year; Says Only Need Mic To Lapet

Illustration: Ahmed Sikander

P

rime Minister Narendra Modi won’t be attending the International Kite Festival in Ahmedabad during this year’s Makar Sankranti celebrations. According to our sources close to the PMO, the PM believes that he doesn’t need a kite and manja but merely a microphone to lapet. The PM’s press secretary confirmed that this has nothing to do with the electoral defeats BJP has suffered in the Hindi Heartland or the monotonous 45 days he has spent inside India without touching any foreign shores.

“To tell you the truth, the PM is bored of flying kites in the traditional manner, climbing on top of a terrace, eating til chikki, blasting Falguni Pathak songs and shouting ‘lapet’ everytime someone’s kite gets cut,” said our source. “When it comes to lapetting, he prefers to use the microphone to communicate effectively, be it from the Red Fort or Doordarshan office. With a kite you can only lapet one person at a time, with a microphone you can lapeto the entire country,” he added.

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