Before GPS, we relied on directions from our friends like, “Pass the seven cows at the circle and take a u-turn from the chaiwalla,” no matter how unreliable those landmarks were. But now, with spoken-word directions from the GPS lady, life is much easier. If only she could work on her Tamil pronunciations.

Grounded airline Jet Airways announces new irresistible offers to redeem JPMiles - buy a tub of multiplex popcorn for 25,000 JP Miles, or save a million for exclusive Taimur selfie.

Both the BJP and the Congress have released their campaign songs – “Phir Ek Bar, Modi Sarkar” and “Ab Hoga Nyay” – a few days before India goes to polls. We’re proud to report that both feature the kind of sentimental vocals and intense instrumental breaks that we usually associate with good governance.

Franchise owners of RCB are desperately looking for an exit, and are planning to buy a stake in the debt-ridden Air India. Owners say that Air India is still a PSU, and the government can depend on taxpayers, LIC, and banks like SBI to bail it out. But RCB is dependent only on two players, Virat Kohli and AB de Villiers.

After Umpire S Ravi completely missed Lasith Malinga’s no-ball, the IPL governing council is planning to replace umpires with chowkidars. This is to ensure that there are no issues in sighting no-balls and wides even when matches stretch late into the night.

After hearing about the new Jet policy, employees from other airlines raise similar demands. Sources say one pilot protested his company’s one-hour lunch policy by refusing to land the plane until he was done eating his kulcha.

Nobody told me the most important part of professional life is tolerating annoying coworkers for eight hours a day. But the greatest thorn in my side has to be the IT guy. I’d much rather have my computer burst into flames while my fingers are stapled to the keyboard than have to deal with him.

Sources say Ajay Devgn kicked dozens of SUVs into space after eating too much paan masala on the sets of Singham Returns. Director Rohit Shetty hopes the anti-satellite weapon can help bring them back down.

“Next week, I think Ashwin should force Jos Butler to pay the Indian cricket team thrice the going tax rate,” Shashi Tharoor said in an emotional press conference. “Only then will the sun finally set on the British Empire!”