By Arré Bench Dec. 01, 2020
Domestic violence is a top crime against women – even more than rape and sexual assault. But it is highly underreported. It takes a lot to stand up to a tormentor at home and for that student activist Shehla Rashid needs to be lauded.
Domestic abuse is an issue that is often talked about in hushed voices within Indian society. Wives and daughters are often advised even by relatives, to not make much of it. In that vein, it is courageous that student activist Shehla Rashid has called out the abuser at home.
In a series of tweets, Rashid revealed that her mother was a victim of domestic abuse for years. “To keep it short and straight, he’s a wife-beater and an abusive, depraved man. We finally decided to act against him, and this stunt is a reaction to that,” she said.
“When my sister and I were kids, we were unable to protect our mother. Now that we have started speaking up against his physical and mental abuse, he has started abusing us too. I have also filed an FIR in September. Request everyone not to take him seriously and let us mourn in peace,” Rashid added.
1) Many of you must have come across a video of my biological father making wild allegations against me and my mum & sis. To keep it short and straight, he's a wife-beater and an abusive, depraved man. We finally decided to act against him, and this stunt is a reaction to that. pic.twitter.com/SuIn450mo2
— Shehla Rashid (@Shehla_Rashid) November 30, 2020
The matter came to light after Rashid’s father Abdul Shora sought security cover from Jammu and Kashmir’s Director General of Police, Dilbag Singh, citing a “threat to his life” from his daughters and wife. He has also alleged that they were carrying out “anti-national” activities.
Shehla Rashid’s father was threatened and had to run to Jammu to file this complaint according to this statement. He alleges that she has been receiving funds from dubious sources. Claims to be unemployed but runs NGO’s pic.twitter.com/lPXhpxf4f8
— Sunanda Vashisht (@sunandavashisht) November 30, 2020
In his letter to the DG, Shora claimed that he was offered money to join the Jammu and Kashmir’s People Movement. “They offered me ₹3 crore for Shehla to join those notorious people. As I felt that the money is coming from illegal channels and shall be used for unlawful activities, I did not take the money, and later asked my daughter to not indulge in any such transactions with these people,” he said in the letter.
“I have a strong belief that anti-national activities are going on in my house, the characters involved in this plan are my daughters, my wife and Shehla’s security man named Sakib Ahmad, who lately threatened me with his pistol for my resistance to Shehla for her activities,” he added.
In a letter written to DGP, J&K, Shehla Rashid's Father Abdul Rashid Shora claimed that Shehla took Rs 3 Crores in cash from 'notorious people' to to further anti-national activities.
Asks for a thorough investigation in her bank accounts. pic.twitter.com/8U5bojHj0u— Rishi Bagree (@rishibagree) November 30, 2020
But refuting the claims, Rashid revealed a horrific tale of domestic abuse. She shared a copy of the court order restraining him from entering their home and a letter to her father from the Mohalla Committee in 2005 asking him not to abuse them.
2) This is not a political matter, as it has been going on ever since I came to senses.
Exhibit 1: Letter to him from Mohalla Committee in 2005 asking him not to abuse us. pic.twitter.com/bgpCNyW3e3
— Shehla Rashid (@Shehla_Rashid) November 30, 2020
3) He had never, in his wildest dreams, imagined that his obedient wife and timid daughters would ever speak up against him. Since he was restrained from entering home by the Hon'ble Court, he's trying to derail the judicial process by resorting to cheap stunts.
— Shehla Rashid (@Shehla_Rashid) November 30, 2020
4) One may talk endlessly about justice, but charity really does begin at home. We have finally decided to not bear abuse silently, as silence only emboldens abusers.
Here's the court order restraining him from entering home dated 17-11-2020. Anything he says is an afterthought pic.twitter.com/2rD4EQxcMV
— Shehla Rashid (@Shehla_Rashid) November 30, 2020
The activist denounced the political angle to the personal issue. Since the allegations were made public, there has been incessant trolling on social media, with #TukdeTukdeGang trending on Twitter for hours. Right-wing trolls have used controversy to take potshots at someone they consider “anti-national”.
A serious domestic violence case being used for petty political commentary tells us everything about the state of our society. It also brings to mind how widespread domestic abuse is in India. Cases of sexual assault and rape often get grab headlines but domestic abuse remains largely underreported. In 2019, domestic violence was the top crime against women – of the 4.05 lakh crimes registered by the National Crimes Bureau last year, 1.26 lakh, i.e. over 30 per cent were that of domestic violence.
A study published in the Journal of Epidemiology & Community Health pointed out that one in three women in India has been subject to some form of domestic abuse in her lifetime. However, only one in ten women report violence to the police, suggesting that putting up the exploitation is normalised.
One in three women in India is a victim of domestic violence, most of which goes unreported. Silence only emboldens the perpetrator.
Huge respect for @Shehla_Rashid's family for speaking out. If it could happen to them, it could happen to anyone.#orangetheworld #16Days https://t.co/WC29wkqSJN— Natasha نتاشا (@nuts2406) November 30, 2020
There are few things that take as much courage as standing up to a tormentor at home, as we have seen in the case of Shehla Rashid, a powerful student activist. What then might be the plight of everyday women?
Since Rashid’s tweets last evening, many have stood behind her courageous decision to call out violence and abuse at home. Author Sanjukta Bose wrote, “Insecure patriarchal man cannot deal with empowered daughters/wife runs to political vultures to play victim” and Supreme Court activist Karuna Nundy lauded her courage.
I knew it. Somebody shared this now, but even before seeing your Tweet I sent out my solidarity tweet because I could just see the story. Insecure patriarchal man cannot deal with empowered daughters / wife runs to political vultures to play victim. https://t.co/iZtnWWUDR4
— Sanjukta Basu (@sanjukta) November 30, 2020
I knew it. Somebody shared this now, but even before seeing your Tweet I sent out my solidarity tweet because I could just see the story. Insecure patriarchal man cannot deal with empowered daughters / wife runs to political vultures to play victim. https://t.co/iZtnWWUDR4
— Sanjukta Basu (@sanjukta) November 30, 2020
There should be no tolerance for intolerance and abuse, and Shehla Rashid’s actions might also encourage others to take such steps. More power to her.
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