Leaked! Prime Minister Modi’s Independence Day Speech!

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Leaked! Prime Minister Modi’s Independence Day Speech!

Illustration: Saachi Mehta/ Arré

W

eedward and Bongstein received an honour usually reserved for serious writers with a penchant for zealous nationalist perspectives – to write the PMs Independence Day Speech. W&B are incredibly humbled at a) being considered serious writers and b) being thought of as having perspective. This is what we sent in:

I just want to start by saying, holy cow mitron! It’s been over two years and I’m still at the top of my game. Unlike the previous government, which was an udder failure, I’ve been able to milk the fact that I serve this country at the highest level by flying to most of the countries in the world.

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