Exposé! Sugar Lobby Behind Macron Win


Exposé! Sugar Lobby Behind Macron Win

Illustration: Akshita Monga


day after the French presidential election saw a macaron named Emmanuel come to power, investigative journalists Weedward & Bongstein received a tip-off from their highly placed confidential source, Deep Nostril.

The explosive exposé blows the lid off the top of a global conspiracy by Big Sugar and is bound to have far-reaching consequences around the globe. According to our source, the immensely powerful sugar lobby plans to install other confections in positions of power around the world. If proved, this could be the biggest newsbreak of our time, even bigger than the Watergateaux Scandal.