Namaste England Review: 2007 Called, Even They Don’t Want this Film Back

Bollywood

Namaste England Review: 2007 Called, Even They Don’t Want this Film Back

Illustration: Shruti Yatam

I

n a recent clip doing the rounds, an Uttar Pradesh cop mimics the sounds of gunshots in a ridiculous – but badass – attempt to intimidate fleeing criminals. In many ways, watching his hapless efforts to project that he’s in control, is like watching Vipul Shah’s Namaste England. Comical, in a profoundly sad way.

Much before the brain fart named Namaste England released, “Why does Arjun Kapoor still have a career?” has been the top question baffling film aficionados. Luckily for Arjun, “Why did someone decide to spend ₹60 crore on Namaste England?” is soon to steal that honour. In fact, Namaste England’s plot is so unbelievably stupid that it parodies itself. After copious amounts of running around in fields (in fucking 2018) and supporting national integration by celebrating almost every Indian festival, the film’s leads, Jasmeet (Parineeti Chopra) and Param (Arjun Kapoor) fall in love. The lovebirds plan to marry but there’s a catch – Jasmeet’s grandfather makes Param’s family swear that she won’t work after marriage. Because the only amount of progressiveness the film can display is, beti padhao, beti ko trophy wife banao.

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