My girlfriend’s male BFF never misses a chance to point out how he knows her better than I ever will, never laughs at my jokes and is particularly quick to write off her romantic prospects, including myself. Some days, I want to strangle the smug bastard.

My partner loved mirror sex and it made me anxious. I’ve caught her on several occasions staring intently, making sexy eyes at herself. But it was only when I brought it up with her that I realised it wasn’t so much about narcissism, but a way of cherishing your own body.

Your life on the working day after a raunchy tryst can feel sometimes like a Moods condom commercial. Enter: The Bangover, a feeling where everything reminds you of your partner’s naked body and your face has a perpetual post-coital glow.