Person of the Week: The Twitter Hacker

Humour

Person of the Week: The Twitter Hacker

Illustration: Mandar Mhaskar

S

ome time last week, poor Rahul Gandhi woke up one morning (at night) and realised that he had just called himself a “meme-worthy fucking faggot” on Twitter. At first, it may have seemed as though the Gandhi scion had misread the notes his social media adviser had given him, but further tweets confirmed that the Congress vice president’s account had indeed been hacked by what could only be a racist, homophobic teenager with a terrible sense of humour.I’m assuming Rahul’s first reaction must have displayed the entire range of his expressions — from “I’m confused” to “I’m very confused”. Going by Baba’s past actions, his first move would probably have been to take a selfie with the hacker’s parents and a bunch of cameramen in a quaint rural household before he realised that it was actually his own account that had been hacked.

We are not clear on who this unidentified hacker is. Any attempt to try and coax some personal information out of him (or her) on Twitter was met with trolling, and in some cases, threats. Either way, for his sheer will to loosen anarchy upon the world, and his complete disregard for the rules of political correctness, we are proud to announce that our Person of the Week is the dude who hacked all the Congress accounts on Twitter. Dust off your keyboard and defragment your drives, because this party is about to get wired.

As soon as the accounts of both the Gandhi scion and the Congress party were hacked, theories of who was behind the attack began to fly. Some wondered if it was a BJP stooge. But the tweets didn’t seem to be from a bhakt in disguise, considering that the hacker responded to one question with a DJ Khaled feat Jay-Z lyric. To cement this case, there was also no mention of UNESCO, Pappu, Chhota Bheem, or Mother Gandhi (Italy).

Some wondered if the hacker was associated with an unidentified group named “legion”. This is wrong on so many levels. For starters, there is no formal hacktivist group called legion — or at least hasn’t been since the early 2000s. It would seem highly unlikely that a random Indian hacker in 2016 would try to claim allegiance to that. Secondly, “We are Legion” (what the hacker said in at least two of his tweets) is part of the famous sign-off of hacktivist group Anonymous (We are legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.)

Most people tend to ignore 4Chan for its horrible interface and its ability to go from 0 to dark faster than you can say “snuff film”.

To connect this hack to Anonymous is a stretch, since it is a global organisation known to focus on bigger issues, such as taking down Donald Trump’s website (it is the best website), and ISIS Twitter handles. But this is exactly what its name implies. Anyone can be Anonymous. Anyone with enough knowledge of technology, and who is clued into the cause, could claim to be a member of Anonymous.

Then there is the verbiage. The hacker called Rahul a “faggot”and changed his official Twitter account handle to “Office of Retarded Gandhi”. He dropped words like “rawr”, “penor”, and the famously racist n-word. Who could this kid be but a hacker from the most deplorable place on the freely accessible internet — 4Chan.

Most people tend to ignore 4Chan for its horrible interface and its ability to go from 0 to dark faster than you can say “snuff film”. For the uninitiated, it looks like your building’s bulletin board after it has been attacked by a three-year-old with crayons. People are called “faggot” or “retarded” so often on 4Chan it should be its trademark. One tweet asked Rahul if he needed some “life lessons with autism”, which sounds exactly like what one guy said to me on 4Chan when I tried to ask him to calm down once. Anecdotal evidence, I know, but it does sound likely.

Either way, this doesn’t seem to be the last we’re going to see of this hacker. He has already promised an entire dump of private emails between Congressmen. One letter purportedly written by Rachit Seth, who handles the Congress’s Main Stream Media Communication, has already been released and pinned to the top of his own profile. The letter is apparently addressed to “Rahul sir” and informs him that his account has been hacked and *insert asslicking here*.

This is some scary stuff right here. It means it is way too easy to hack into top government profiles. (Just days after Twittergate one boy from Mumbai claimed to have hacked into Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s app.) As the hacker said, this is just the beginning. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

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