What Stopped CBSE Topper From Scoring a Perfect 100?

Humour

What Stopped CBSE Topper From Scoring a Perfect 100?

Illustration: Juergen Dsouza

M

ay 29, Mahipalpur, New Delhi: CBSE topper Meghna Srivastava’s astounding score of 499/500 has given new meaning to the phrase, “leaving a mark”. Naturally, this is cause for Ms Srivastava’s family to immediately declare a three-day mourning period for the mark that prevented her from scoring the perfect 500. This will be followed by an angry few days of dharnas in the searing heat outside the CBSE office to demand to see the answer sheet. Obviously, the 0.2 per cent that she missed out on is secondary to the 99.8 per cent she scored.

Our sources tell us that Ms Srivastava’s score has spawned a flurry of conspiracy theories. We spoke to expert neurologist, Dr Rath K Lele who suspects that the 0.2 per cent loss might have been due to increased exposure to harmful elements like Tripura CM Biplab Deb’s remark about Mahabharat internet. “Such catastrophic displays of ineptitude have the power to fry brain cells instantly,” Dr Lele told our reporter. “Perhaps poor Meghna was unwittingly exposed to the drivel coming out of Deb’s mouth in this clip.” He further stated that he expects the release of the recent Race 3 trailer to have similar consequences on students’ grades in the future.

READ MORE

Comments